Bury St Edmunds 4th Team vs Braintree Social Team.
On what felt like the hottest day of the year a travelling band of merry men, careened through the A roads of the eastern England on their way to the second coming of Braintree’s season. Depleted in numbers but with a core of excited, amiable and slightly deluded vagabonds the scene was set. A first for social rugby, every one was on time and the smell of deep heat, Vaseline and anticipation filled the changing room.
A shout out to the Bury St Edmund club for their amazing facilities, I could not helped be impressed by the fact that each changing room had ample space and its own toilet and showering space. There was also a treatment table, however as social team since we are all past the point of treatment it became a nice place to store the towels. We were then led down to the pitch, which I can not complement enough, it was like dancing on pillows and when you fell down its embrace was that of a soft bosom of a comely young woman from Braintree.
The man in charge of this significant celebration of sport was taking charge of his first senior game and there was an air of trepidation when he was introduced to the captains. When we were told this there was a shared glance between the two captains, “we could have some fun today”. How wrong we were, this young man has a big future in the game and led the game well and kept the two recalcitrant captains in place.
As kick off neared the clouds waxed and waned and then departed for good and the heat just continued to rise. We were regaled with tales from Kev May that it was hotter in Cyprus when he played for the Army. This was a surprise to us all as Kev had never mentioned he’d been in the army before let alone regale us with a tale. With 14 men before we even began, thus ensued some horse trading between captains that resulted in us being able to borrow their Captain Sam, who played for us with gusto throughout. It also meant that the Ellis brother, of which there were two, with the most fingers had to move from second row to the wing.
Under a blazing sky, battle commenced, and the first quarter was played at a frenetic pace that belied our years. Both teams shared looks of confusion as we covered each blade of the finely manicured pitch, seemingly forgetting that there was still 60 minutes to go. Over those next 60 minutes the pace slowed, the numbers decreased, and scrums went to non-competitive. However, the quality never dropped.
Try scorers who deserve and honourable mention again this week began with Rob Ingram. He crashed over the line, looking like the bearded Viking he is. The bury line disintegrated as surely as the guards at Colchester as Boadicea swept through these lands many years before.
Up next stepped the Ellis brother with the most fingers and how that full complement assisted him with this try. Underestimated as the second row on the wing Nick, took the ball and cut inside like an older, larger Harvey Ellis and with beguiling turn of pace planted the ball under the posts.
Following from there, there was a try that mirrored the 1971 Lions (full disclosure the author was involved again!). Dean carried strongly through the middle of the park, taking a cabal of Bury defenders to bring him down, not to be defeated he popped the ball from the floor to his Skipper. Skipper took the ball further up the centre and realising that age, 30 years of smoking and other incredibly poor life choices had left him defeated thus shipped the ball to Dan Scott. Looking like a modern day cavalier with his flowing locks, Mr Scott glided over the beautiful pitch and touched down for another try.
Finally in the scoring positions was Mitchell. After a slight error of judgement which demonstrated to his whole team why he had left football for rugby Mitchell was keen to make amends. Following a whole team effort of gloriously old-fashioned rugby with the A ball being used to great effect, redemption was in sight for Mitchell. Seeing his opportunity to enter the pantheon of phoenixes who rise from the flame of ignominy, Mitchell took his chance. Picking the ball up and crashing over the line, salvation was achieved.
At the climax of the game a spirit of joy, brotherhood and exhaustion ejaculated across both teams. The heat had done its worst but could not dampen the enthusiasm for a sport that bonds both teams together. Rugby as they say this day was the winner once again, Bury may have led the scoring charts but both teams can hold their heads high and each player knew they had done their part. In what seems to be a crisis in the modern age of rugby Braintree Social continue their tradition of travelling to any game no matter how many players we have. We cannot thank Bury enough for their warm welcome, great facilities and welcome and we hope to see you again soon.

Jim